Any Other Way
by Jeebus dirtface
Summary: It's just another day for Robin as the crew entertain her in their various plights.


Author's note: I don't own anime or manga. I merely adore it.

"FOOD!!" The captain screamed in anticipation as he raced over to the source of the smell.

Robin held a plate of finely weaved cuisine in her hands, exiting the kitchen, turning the opposite direction before the noise alerted her. As she turned around slowly, she heard the sound of something crashing hard into hollow metal, as it reverberated followed by a hard thump as someone hit the floor.

"Ouch, ouch, ouch!" Luffy moaned, as he clutched his nose. Standing there was the ship's chef, an irritated expression on his face, biting on his cigarette with an empty saucepan in hand.

"I made that food for Robin-chan, idiot." He declared, before hearts dominated his eyes as he swung his hips around in a love-struck manner.

"Oi, I'm the captain! Make me food instead!" At that point, Robin decided she was no longer involved in the current debate, and left the two to sort their differences out.

She took a seat in a secluded area of the ship, resting the plate on her lap. Plucking up a piece with a fork, she brought to her mouth, but once again found her attention drawn elsewhere.

"What did you say?" Zoro's face looked demonic. He looked like he was ready to kill someone. There was an aura of dread surrounding him, and his poor target quivered in fear.

"AAAH! Save me! Save me!" The long nosed one looked around hastily before laying eyes on Robin. He promptly positioned himself so that she was now between the predator and his prey.

"You…used my katana… to do what?" Zoro pronounced the syllables slowly, adding to his monstrous demeanour. Even Robin felt slightly unnerved, not that she showed it underneath that smile of hers. Placing the fork back on her plate, she turned to Zoro calmly.

"If I may ask, what did he do to your Katana, Mr. Swordsman?" He shifted his focus to her, lightening up a bit but still visibly angry. Pointing at the criminal, though many would beg to differ at the scene, he revealed the offence.

"That bastard used my katana to pick his goggles from the toilet." His voice shook violently as he spoke. Clearly, this was no light matter. Despite that, Robin had to suppress a giggle at the hilarity of the situation. If he were not so deadly serious, she would've laughed.

She felt tense fingers wrap around her arm.

"Save me, Robin! Save me from this demon!" That was the last straw for Zoro. He charged at Usopp manically, ignoring the fact that Robin was stuck between them. The plate was pushed over and it clattered into the ground. Robin held up her arms to shield her face as Zoro wrenched a twitching, struggling Usopp from his grasp on Robin. Holding Usopp up now, Zoro sneered sadistically.

"I've got the perfect punishment for you." With that, Zoro stalked off with a helpless, albeit flailing, Ussopp in hand.

Robin sighed, and bent down to clear up the mess. Perhaps this was fortunate; she didn't really have much of an appetite at the moment. She went to the kitchen, to return the mess but instead found an odd scene.

Luffy was trying to yank open the fridge for some freshly stored food earlier, and Sanji was desperately trying to hold him back.

"Let's go! Let me at my food!"

"No! I specially prepared that food for Nami-swan and Robin-chwan for Tea!" Sanji implored, to no avail. There was no reasoning with Luffy, not when it came to this.

"I don't care! I want food now!" The Straw Hat Captain childishly asserted. The struggle continued for about half a minute more before Robin made her presence clear.

"Excuse me, Mr. Cook and Mr. Captain, but there was an accident and I've spoilt my food." Both men divereted their attention as she held the plate forward to provide evidence. Luffy seized the opportunity. Shifting the direction of his momentum, he lunged at the plate, ripping it from Robin's light grasp and shoving his face in it. Sanji knew it was too late to stop him, but not to berate him.

"Luffy! Where are your manners? That's no way to treat a lady!" He turned to Robin. "Never mind, Robin-chwan! I'll make you a new dish which is tastier than the last!" She held her hand up apologetically.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Cook, but I do not feel very hungry right now. Maybe later!" Undeterred by her refusal, he swooned.

"Hai, Robin-chan, I'll having something special prepared!" Meanwhile, Luffy munched away vigorously at the stolen food.

Robin walked back to her seat, but this time, she went to the edge and looked over. There was nothing but empty sea for as far as she could see. It was beautiful, in a tragic sort of way, she mused. She didn't know why she came to this conclusion, but that's just how it appeared.

"AAH! Don't come near me, you monster!" Usopp dashed out the room and ran as fast as his legs would warrant. Zoro came to the doorway, looking to head in the direction of Usopp but decided against it. He would get his revenge later. Instead he went to stand next to Robin.

"What's out there?" He asked. She stifled a chuckle at his bluntness. She looked at him to see his concentrated face looking out to sea. Did he really think she was looking at something? It seemed so.

"I was just thinking." He raised his arm and took a swig from a bottle of some heavily intoxicated drink, but didn't respond to her. Instead, he changed the subject.

"Tell Usopp he's a dead man if you see him." With that, he took another swig and stalked off, leaving Robin to her thoughts again.

They were a crazy bunch, she thought. Definitely nothing like her, that was for certain. But she wouldn't have it any other way.

Author's note: Yeah, so I excluded Chopper and Nami. They just didn't fit into the story, that's all. If you've read this far, then a review would be appreciated.


End file.
